yr nasty

unpopulaer @ 2009-11-08T12:02:00

2009-11-08T16:03:48Z

god damnit i am so stupid.
i am not in love with every boy i see why is my brain telling me that.

I HAVE A GAT DAMN CRUSH ON EVERYONE WHO TALKS TO ME.

jesus christ.

2009-10-29T20:43:11Z

FIRST THINGS FIRST
I'm dressing as beyonce for holloween.
onto more sexy things.
two boys with the same name want to date me.
BUT, I have a crush on a blonde boy. Which is wierd because I normally am not attracted to blondes.
I really am acting like such a fucking chick lately. It's lame but it's also kind of fun.
boysboysboysboysboysboysboysboysboys
BOYS.
I want to go dress shopping, I need more dresses.
Something to accentuate my flawless rack.

I miss having a libido.....

anyways, I'm going to rip off my clothes and dance till I'm sweaty.
it's my new workout regime.

my seasonal affective disorder is going into hibernation for the winter.
WOO HOOOOOOO!

xoxo gossip girl

unpopulaer @ 2009-10-19T00:27:00

2009-10-19T03:28:50Z

i want to move far away again.
and change my name to nancy.
maybe get married and join a beach boys cover band.
wouldn't it be niiiiiiice.

unpopulaer @ 2009-09-30T12:25:00

2009-09-30T15:40:19Z

i really do love blink 182.
i really am 12 years old.

i'm hanging out with an old flame later and im thinking its a bad idea.
i'll keep you posted.

unpopulaer @ 2009-09-21T15:49:00

2009-09-21T18:50:22Z

somedays all i can really do is just sit and cry.
[today is one of those days]

maybe i'm wierd.

2009-08-31T14:53:14Z

sometimes i just really wanna kiss boys.

the history books forgot about us and the bible didnt mention us

2009-08-23T23:12:44Z

I don't know why whenever I'm happy for a long period of time my head gives me a stupid reason not to be.

I saw the guy I lost my virginity to last night for the first time,he did what he's good at.
not talking to me. I came home and cried on my kitchen floor. It's not like I want him, or anything to do with him. I just want him to aknowledge that what he did hurt me, it still hurts.I just want him to ask me if I'm okay and I want to tell him no,then not see him again.

I'm basically over it, I swear.

Montreal Tuesday 6am.
Maybe I'll canoodle with a french boy to take my mind off how sick I am of this place.
Or maybe I'll just have conversations with homeless people at 5am as per usual.

Life is wierd.

unpopulaer @ 2009-08-18T11:57:00

2009-08-18T14:58:30Z

Really though.....

cruel summer

2009-08-04T14:31:10Z

This summer has been life changing, just not in the way I wanted it to be.
I feel like I've gone against everything I believe in like I'm somehow less of a person.
I recently (actually a month ago to this day) had sex for the first time.
It was the guys first time too so in the back of my mind I thought this could be something special.
But it turned out it was nothing and he hasn't spoken a word to me since.
I no longer have this idea of sex being this beautiful thing between two people.
He and I weren't even really attracted to each other I think we were both just bored and fucked up.
I now know there's a huge difference between fucking and making love.
I really wish I didn't wait so long to have sex because now that I've done it,it doesn't even seem like it was worth waiting for.

Blegh, I'm messed up.

you've been acting awful tough lately, smoking a lot of ciggarettes lately.

2009-07-30T13:43:58Z

I find it absolutely disgusting that some guys don't get the word no. It's a word that can't be misenterpreted, it's so simple. All the slimeballs are making me be afraid of even the decent guys.
I have never really participated in the dating scene. At first, because I didn't want to date someone just to date someone. Now I'm just plain scared.
All people aren't the same, good people are out there. I guess I just need to open up.

I can't wait to leave.....

unpopulaer @ 2009-07-02T08:37:00

2009-07-02T15:39:57Z

I haven't felt this low in years.

v u l n e r a b l e.

I need someone to just hold me and tell me everything is going to get better in time.

unpopulaer @ 2009-06-09T11:08:00

2009-06-09T18:08:22Z

most of the people im friends with are pretty horrible people.

unpopulaer @ 2009-06-06T13:37:00

2009-06-06T20:37:42Z

unpopulaer @ 2009-05-31T12:01:00

2009-05-31T15:03:50Z

sometimes feeling bears over me like a tide and it makes me want to scream.
i thought i wasnt ready to leave but comming back was the hardest part.

i need to take care of myself cause no one else knows how to do it.
i'm not looking back this time.

you're invisible now you have no secrets to conceal

2009-05-17T17:39:22Z

sleep is for the weak.

i am destined for greatness.

unpopulaer @ 2009-04-27T22:15:00

2009-04-28T01:16:45Z

home is a very wierd place
i thought i'd be happier.

montreal in the near future, ya.

louis armstrong

2009-04-09T08:46:00Z

My life is pretty wierd. But I love it.
I'm going to London next weekend to stay in a hostel with Keara.
Then I'm flying to Montreal to hang out with Cassie.
She needs me right now and I need her.
Then I am going the fuck home, I'm pretty content with that decision.
My agency here is just kind of crappy, like they set me up with two families that I wasnt compatible with at all.
One of which was completely fucking insane.
My agency back home has been good though.
In ways I'm pretty dissapointed in myself that I didnt stick it out but whats the fucking point if im not happy.

I'm excited for the future.

secret.

2009-03-28T04:15:16Z

i read all your discustingly bittersweet romantic blogs and i pretend that i'm the girl your writing about.

....
lol

truth;

2009-03-09T15:05:07Z

sometimes i get so lonely i forget what my name is or what day it is.

lets fill the streets with love or light or heat whatever

2009-03-02T10:44:07Z

Sometimes I feel like I'm not made out for this.
But then I know I'm not made out for rotting alone on PEI making minimum wage.

I'm not used to people not instantly thinking I'm great upon meeting me, it's kind of a blow to my over inflated ego. But this isn't about my ego it's about my job. I really feel like Ola doesn't like me and it just makes my job so much harder. I feel so nervous all the time, which makes me do my job worse. I've already quit one job (not my fault though they were completely apeshit). And I do like certain aspects of this job its just hard living with and working for someone you just dont really get along with. I'm not sure whether to stick it out or talk to my agency about it. I really dont wanna seem like a diva, but I do want this to be the best experience possible.

hooooooooooooooooo hummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

ON A LIGHTER AND MORE KICK ASS NOTE

I went to Leeds this weekend to meet Rory and I had so much fun. We didn't actually even do anything fun. We're just so much alike and it was fun just hanging out and talking and being our rediculous selves.

i dont care about clever i dont care about funny.

2009-02-07T10:09:39Z

It's hard to find time to actually write anything in here ( or at all) scince I've arrived in England.
Here are a few details of my stay as of now
-Leave on one days notice, first time on a plane, first time out of canada.
-Arrive blissfully unaware of how this job works.
-Really enjoyed my first 5 days or so.
-Work 12 days straight with no days off.
-Dont leave the house in the entirety of my stay with my first family.
-Mention to my agency what my work situation is, I am working six days a week for as much as 16 hours a day...this is not right as I'm still only getting paid 150£ ,which is what they offered me for 5 days a week and 12 hrs a day.
-Agency flips shit and tells me to leave that house ASAP.
-The day of my departure I tell my family the whole situation, I get called a liar,bitch,theif,slut etc etc... by a 48 year old man
-48 year old man proceeds to take my passport and throw my luggage out the front door.
- My agency calls the police,they come and calm me down and retreive my passport.
-I go to my agents brother in laws house they feed me and give me beer.
-SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
-I have a meeting with a new mum
-Shes cool and her daughter is adorable.
-I move in
-First week of work wasnt so bad
And here I am now. I don't know how to feel about this job or this place yet.
I'm not cool yet, My only friend in this country is like 4 hours away.
I'm going to visit him in 2 weeks time.

I'll probably update you again when something interesting actually happens.

p.s. I'm going to marry the trolley pushing boy at asda.
p.s.s And the boy at the coffee shop.

wow.

2009-01-16T12:55:41Z

Just like that I'm moving to England tommorow.
I got 2 days notice.
I have never been so scared/happy/hopeful/sad/unprepared/greatful in my whole life.

shes nearly six feet tall she must think im a flea

2009-01-07T22:42:02Z

all i ever do is pretend.

ganja babe

2008-12-31T05:39:46Z

90% of what i say is the wine talking.
new year new start.

fuck boys i just wanna dance.

note to self;

2008-12-15T15:25:03Z

-Don't look forward to things, they will end up not happening.
-Don't tell people things are for sure when they aren't

I'm not moving to Northampton anymore, the Mariners have terminated contact with me.
Their loss.

Oh well I'm guaranteed a host family, I just want one now so I can be outta here A.S.A.P
This place is really starting to drive me insane....Litteraly.

Bummmmmmmmmmmmmmed.

Oh well christmas is comming, which I'm only excited cause I miss my sister and she will hopefully pull me out of this funk.

I need to get out of this stupid ass crack of a town before it kills me.